How to Improve Family Life

Posted on September 11, 2005
How to Improve Family Life - Philosophy of Happiness in Life

:Shree Hari:

Ashwin Krishna Chaturthi, Vikram Samvat 2063, Somvar

Give up the insistence of wanting things to happen your way, according to your mind, and do what other’s desire. As long as, what the other person wants is rightful, just and you have the ability to do it. Doing so, you will become gratified for life. Decide today, we are only going to give to the family and the world, not take from it.

How to Improve Family Life

How to maintain love, happiness and peace in the family?

Swamiji:The main impediments in any relationship is when a person wants things to happen his way. He wants his words to hold weight, his desires to be fulfilled or all are for his own self interest.

When one thinks about the other person, and doing good to other persons, by honoring and providing comfort to them, and wishing them well and imbibing in thoughts of their welfare, then all members of the family become happy.

What is the primary reasons for fights in a household?

Swamiji: Generally within every household there are fights primarily due to two reasons:-

1) The other person should do all the work, earn a living, making a living and bearing all the expenses and

2) I will do the spending, shopping etc.

I am to receive all the rest, respect, and all glories come to me. From these two points, most of the troubles begin. If these were to be reversed, that is, I do all the work and you relax and rest. That respect, hospitality, admiration, happiness are not taken, rather they are given. If such things are done amongst each other – giving of respect, admiration, rest, relaxation, carrying out orders, making others happiness etc., then love will surely
increase.

How to be truly gratified in a family life?

Swamiji: Man’s nature is such that he likes the fulfillment of his desires. When things happen according to his desires, he feels happy. There is desire for wealth, respect, fame, and to live a full life. But of all of these desires,
the main desire is that what ever my mind desires, that should happen. This is not something that one should feel good about.

If we give up the insistence of our mind, and if we do what other’s desire, then we will become gratified for
life. Only two things we have to watch out for, that whatever others are asking us to do, is rightful and just (nyaayukt) and we have the ability to fulfill that desire.

What must one do to attain this gratification, this peace and harmony in family life?

Swamiji: For this, there is a straightforward solution. Just decide once and for all, that we are not going to take anything from this world – we are only going to serve this world. The reason to serve this world is because we have taken a lot from this world in the past, so now it is time to give back in return. We have to give the family, to the world, not take from it.

If members live lovingly with one another, the atmosphere will be full of peace and happiness and love evolves automatically by renunciation of selfishness and pride.

From “Jivan Upyogi Pravachan ” in Hindi by Swami Ramsukhdasji

Ram Ram

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